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Community Service Program

Honor Your Family Elders

Seniors Need To Understand You Love & Respect Them

Our society can be tough on seniors. Ageism is a prevalent issue. In addition, the changes brought on by age can sap a person’s self-esteem and confidence. Family members should be aware of this and make sure that they let their elders know that they are respected, appreciated, loved and a valuable part of the family.

To do this effectively, it is important to understand the language of love that your family member understands and values. Are your words more important than actions? Or visa versa? Do they place value on time or on things? Do they need a hug?

If you do not communicate your love in a preferred method, it can be missed or misunderstood. Even if you think your message is getting through, never take success for granted. Keep a watchful eye for what communicates love, and keep others in the family informed.

For some people, a gift may make them feel loved. For others, the kindness of your action or the time you spend with them may be seen as more valuable than the gift.

Love Languages

Communicate Effectively

There are many ways to get across that you love and care for someone, even if a person is elderly, and even if they have memory problems. Author Gary Chapman consolidates these methods into The Five Love Languages, which include:

  1. Words of Affirmation - Compliments and encouragement go a long way. Keep them simple and mean what you say.
  2. Quality Time - Go beyond being present physically. Maintain focus, listen, be patient and make an emotional connection.
  3. Receiving Gifts - A physical or intangible gift should be given with the proper spirit and be something valued by the receiver.
  4. Acts of Service - Provide support and care. Or, you can wait patiently (and encourage) while a senior does for themselves.
  5. Physical Touch - A hug, holding a hand, a kiss or a neck massage can mean so much.

Each person has different preferences in how they wish to be communicated with. Consider your elderly loved one as having a dialect you need to understand and respond to in kind.

Pay attention to the way they react to the world around them. Listen for their likes and dislikes. You may even ask them what they prefer.

Here are some simple examples of how you may express to an elderly loved one that they matter.

  • Asking an elderly person’s opinion can be a fabulous way to show that you respect them.
  • A birthday gift that includes personal time with you communicates in two of the love languages at once.
  • Taking hold of a hand while you walk may make a very strong emotional connection.
  • Making sure a grandchild spends enjoyable time with their grandparent is a service that is often treasured by everyone.
(Sources: The World’s Easiest Guide To Family Relationships, ezinearticles.com)